No really. I ordered a pair. They’re getting here next week.

I might be waiting by the mailbox. Right. Now.

And hot tip! If you order on Amazon from Tees and Toys, they qualify for free super saver shipping. Boom goes the dynamite!

It’s time for a healthy eating update! I’ve officially been on the Lose It app for a full month, and the Pajama Jeans have been ordered. I’m beyond excited.

I know guys. But stay with me here. They’re pajamas. AND they’re jeans. And they’re as seen on tv, so it’s pretty much a given that as an owner of a Magic Bullet, some Nelly’s Dryer Balls, and Mighty Putty, the Pajama Jeans are gonna make an appearance at my house sooner or later.

But that’s beside the point! The point is Lose It has done exactly what I wanted it to – it has completely changed the way I eat. You’re only alloted a certain number of calories a day, and you log what you’re eating as the day goes on so you can see where you’re at. If you eat an Islands burger and fries, you’re easily gonna blow all of your calories at lunch, leaving virtually nothing for breakfast or dinner. If you want to be able to eat heartily for all three meals AND snackage, you better start picking healthier alternatives.

I said before, I’ll say again. I’m not dieting to lost weight, really. I’m dieting to get healthier. Last night was the first time in a month that I’ve had fast food, which is pretty much amazing. I haven’t had a soda since xmas. I go to the gym once a week, and find other ways to be active at least 1 or 2 other days of the week. My plan is to do Lose It all through 2012, just to really hammer in the healthy eating. If I can do this for a full year, I’ll have a really good handle on what to eat, and what not to eat.

I bought some Smart Dogs soy hot dogs to try out last week, since they had way less calories than regular hot dogs and still a good amount of protien. Seemed like a good thing to try for lunch with Phil. (He loves em by the way.)

And it brought up an interesting question… You know how it’s widely accepted that hot dogs contain less than desireable parts of the cow… Lips and a-holes, that’s the saying…

This question is a little delicate.

Um…

What about Smart Dogs?

Is there an undesirable part of the soybean? Am I eating it?

Yikes.

Let the musical stylings of Phil C and the Poop Explosions provide the soundtrack to your upcoming wedding, bar mitzvah, or corporate meeting.

Deposit required.

(Disclaimer: Phil C is currently going through a nudist phase. He may show up to your event, shall we say, lacking pants.)

Seeing this post in the newsletter? Sorry that video doesn’t show up in email; you can check it out on the blog. Trust me, you don’t wanna miss it.

What? You’re not on the newsletter? You should sign up! Never miss out on the hilarity again!

The internet came to my rescue not once, but twice recently. It never fails to blow my mind how sometimes you can just put out to the world a small thing you need help with and boom. Good people come forward to lend a hand.

Crisis 1: My pencil sharpener. I was working on a tee design project for a client last week, and the biggest frustration I was running into was not getting the artwork right. It was that my $1 battery-powered pencil sharpener was refusing to cooperate and just sharpen my freaking pencil so I could work. If you follow me on twitter or facebook… I may have complained a lot about it that day. Sorry about that.

Fast forward a few days, and I got an awesome present in the mail from Josh’s Aunt Lynda. BEHOLD, I have a new manual pencil sharpener that sharpens like a dream come true!!!

Unfortunately, I’m a little hard on my pencils. And I broke the point off about 3.2 seconds after that perfect sharpening experience.

But still! I am so thankful for this new pencil sharpener. Auntie Spike, you’re the best! But let’s not forget, there’s still another crisis I needed help with.

Crisis 2: CSS code finagling on my online portfolio. I have over 10 years of work broken down into a bunch of categories in my online portfolio, and over the past few months, I’ve decided the old wordpress gallery layout I was using just didn’t look pro enough. So I put a snappy new slideshow functionality on my home page, and decided I liked it so much I’d use it on my portfolio pages, too.

I set it up on a couple of pages, and as time went on I realized I really needed to adjust the options on that plugin so I could speak with clients about specific pieces and styles in it over the phone or email easier. I decided to add the number navigation the plugin had available, but started running into some issues. It just. Wasn’t. Working. I can usually hold my own in tweaking css code to do whatever I want, but this plugin was giving me some serious crap.

I put out a call to help over Facebook, and the goodness of the internet community provided again. Michael Winchester of Michael Winchester Designs took time out of his day to help work out coding issues, and as we talked back and forth throughout the day my friend Alain chimed in as well. Between the three of us, we got the apparel page of my freelance graphic design portfolio back in tiptop shape!

Now if only I had enough time between projects to get the rest of that portfolio lookin’ as good. (Internet friends? Anyone? Crickets, crickets?)

Again, I am so grateful to the three of you that helped out when I was havin some problems. Sharing like that helps make the internets a better place.

What about the rest of you? Have you had your problems solved by internet friends recently? Let’s chat in the comments!

I shared the Craftcation Conference website with you guys recently as a show and tell – to date, it’s the largest, most intricate, involved website I have ever built, and I’m pretty proud of it. You want an interactive forum? Online ticketing integration? A clickable, easy to use schedule matrix that links up who’s teaching what classes? You got it. Boom, boom, boom.

I don’t know if I shared that I’m also leading some workshops at the conference that weekend. Click here to check it out!

So here’s where I bug you to come hang out with me March 22 through 25 in Ventura. It’s going to be a blasty!

“But Steph, I want MOAR INFORMATION!”

“Well hold your horses, I got some! How about an official statement about the awesomeness of Craftcation Conference from Nicole Stevenson and Delilah Snell, the crafty brainiacs behind Patchwork and the creators of Craftcation!”

Craftcation is a three-day indie business & DIY conference featuring lectures and DIY workshops with leading industry professionals on art, craft and food-centered small business in Ventura, Ca March 22-25 2012.

Craftcation features more than 50 workshops, lectures and events led by over 30 presenters like Jenny Hart, Kathy Cano-Murillo (a.k.a. The Crafty Chica!), Cathy Callahan, Christine Haynes, LaurenVenell, Nicole Vasbinder, Aida Mollenkamp, Evan Klieman, Rena Tom and The Urban Craft Center.

If you want to start, maintain or grow your indie business or take a break from your routine and learn new skills while networking, then Craftcation is for you! Craftcation will ignite the entrepenurerial business spirit and strengthen skills and abilities of both seasoned business owners and newcomers to indie craft business.

Events and topics include:

Indie Business: how to start a crafty business, maximizing social media, blogging, in’s & out’s of indie craft shows, etsy, wholesaling, merchandising, accounting, legal issues, branding, website design, marketing on a budget and more.

DIY Workshops:  screenprinting, sewing, canning & preserving, cheesemaking, needle arts, terrariums & edible gardens, organic bath products, jewelry, embroidery, bookbinding and more.

Community: meet & greets, pop-up shops, yoga, bbq & cocktail socials and so much more!

For more info please visit www.craftcationconference.com or like us on facebook! Don’t forget to book your room by Feb. 15 to get the group discount! And the early bird discount tickets stop selling on January 31! See you there!

Josh and I are both still going strong with the Lose It app, I just want you guys to know. And we didn’t let his birthday last weekend derail our New Year’s Resolution! I found this great recipe online for low calorie mini chocolate cupcakes, so I made those to celebrate.

They’re perfect for the Lose It app, because they’re reasonably low cal at 73 per serving. Smuggling our own tiny celebration cakes into Disneyland in the bottom of Phil’s diaper bag meant we didn’t have to splurge on one of Disney’s crazy delicious confections that we had no definite calorie count for. And they were perfect for Josh because they’re chocolate! Everybody wins!

What’s your favorite low calorie, low fat diet dessert? If you’ve got a link to an online recipe, totally share it in the comments!

Click here for the Low Fat Mini Chocolate Cupcake recipe I found. Enjoy!

Sorry for the break in blog posts everyone – work was ridiculously crazy last week, and there was literally zero time to post anything about anything! But rest easy, we’re back!

We went to Disneyland with Jay & his fiancee Elizabeth on Sunday to celebrate Josh’s birthday:

Phil is a crazy huge fan of dogs, so he had to stop and say hello to Pluto. He was so fascinated by the huge friendly dog with the big shiny nose! He was a little reluctant to give him a high five, but was more than happy to honk that nose.

The funny thing is Phil’s biggest thrill all day was leading his stroller through the park. He just started walking by himself over Christmas, and this was his first trip to Disneyland where he could do some real walking. All day long, all he wanted to do was hang onto the side of that stroller and help walk it everywhere we went!

It was a fun day of just walkin around having good times and popcorn, and we were able to catch up with our friends Eric and Deb at the Pirates of the Caribbean which was great. We weren’t sure we’d be able to meet up with them, and then we’re standing in line and boom there they are in line just a little ways ahead of us!

We got to talking about the Pirates of the Caribbean ride on the way home. And how it was so much better when it was just a ride, and not a commercial for the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. Back in our day when we were kids, it was just a cool ride about pirates runnin around looting and plundering. Now they beat you over the head with Captain Jack Sparrow at every turn. I think they’ve added even more Cap’n Jack since the last time I was on the ride a couple of years ago. And that “your boat is going directly into this wall of water with a talking pirate from one of the movies superimposed on it” effect was cool, but 100% unneccessary, guys.

It just cheapens the message. Pirates are cool. That’s all that ride is supposed to be. I understand making it a commercial for the movies, but I just can’t get behind it.

Same thing with It’s a Small World.

It’s a Small World is different these days. Look real close when you’re going through the Hawaii area. The little boy surfer has been replaced by Lilo and Stitch. There’s a Cinderella and some mice in another part of the ride. Ariel in the underwater section. What used to be a celebration of kids from all over the world is slowly turning into a commercial for Disney movies. It just kinda makes me sad. Not like It’s a Small World was ever one of my favorite rides, and I certainly like seeing the Disney characters all Mary Blair-ized. But you guys lost the magical kids around the world singing together just a little when you started adding the movie characters. This is like the one place there should be zero characters.

Well maybe there shouldn’t be any characters in Abe Lincoln’s room either. As long as you keep the movie characters outta there, we’re good.

I actually haven’t been in the Abe Lincoln exhibit in ages. Are there characters in there now? Someone go check and report back. Cuz that room is a total snoozefest.

“More sopapillas please!!”

That classic Cartman quote is what runs through my head just about every time I hear the news talking about SOPA. And then I started actually listening to the news talk about this issue, and um… yikes. It sounds pretty bad, people. On paper it looks great – SOPA stands for “Stop Online Piracy Act”. We don’t like pirates, right? (Forget Johnny Depp for a minute.) But stay with me folks. Basically if SOPA passes, internet censorship will become the norm. If a site is accused of hosting pirated material, that site essentially disappears.

It feels a little scary, a little Big-Brother-Is -Watching-And-I’m-Not-Talking-About-The-Reality-Show. And the more I read, the less I like it. It raises all kinds of questions – if I create some kind of funny parody picture for my blog, could the copyright holder of that original image get my site reported and taken out of search engine results? That’s pretty much a livelihood killer right there, guys. My whole design career is currently based on having a website and connecting with potential clients through it.

And that’s taking things a little personally, I know. SOPA was created to take down websites like Pirate Bay based in other countries that promote copyright infringement by letting people download movies and music and whatever. But it becomes a witchhunt before you know it, you know? Leave Britney alone!

I’ll be honest, I’m not the best at explaining political type things. This has just been my broad generalization of how I understand this bill. If you’d like to learn more about SOPA, take a look at some of the following links:

How SOPA Affects You on CNet

SOPA on Wikipedia (link will be affected by blackout protests on 1/18/12)

SOPA and PIPA explained on BBC.com

What can you do? Visit Stop American Censorship’s website and find out all the ways you can take action.

How do you feel about this controversial bill? Let’s get a conversation going in the comments!

(Image lovingly borrowed from South Park. With parody text. Please don’t report my website for copyright infringement.)

Don’t forget to file your State of California Sales Tax, guys!

One major benefit to focusing on freelance graphic design last year? I only had 4 transactions that had to collect sales tax. Filing my taxes took 5 minutes!

Okay, 10 minutes. It took me just a tiny bit to remember where the helpful sales tax prep sheet was in Quickbooks. But the point is, I got there.

If only filing income tax was that easy.

Le sigh…

Here we are, a little more than a week into the new year, and my resolution to start living a little healthier is going awesome! Check out the fab tomato and bean soup I made last weekend using a recipe from The Soup Bible Carole had given me for Christmas. I made tomato sauce from Nadia G’s new Cookin’ For Trouble book last week, too, and had some left over. Into the soup it goes!

I’m not a large-framed person, so pretty much every time I’ve mentioned to someone that I’m on a tiny bit of a diet I’ve heard the same response. “Um, you don’t need to lose any weight. If anything please gain a few pounds.”

Don’t worry, folks. I’m not on a I want to lose weight diet. I’m on a I want to be healthier diet. While the Lose It app on my phone says I’m going to lose 5 pounds or so in the next month and a half, I fully expect to gain weight, because I’m trying to work out, muscle weighs more than fat, etc etc etc. I have a healthy body image – I don’t think I’m fat, I think I’m out of shape and had a babby a year ago.

So here’s the thing. I’m using the Lose It app, and have been extremely good about it for a full week now. I haven’t weighed in, so I don’t know what the results are so far, but I feel good and not gross, using it has made me ultra aware of what I’m eating, and has in turn encouraged healthier choices. Instead of my regular Fancy Coffee Friday featuring a Mocha Latte with Whipped Cream, I cut the calories in half by ordering it with nonfat milk and no whip. And guess what. Still delicious.

I’ve set kind of a strange goal for myself to encourage the healthy eating for a whole month. If I can stick with this thing for an entire month, I’m allowed to buy myself a pair of Pajama Jeans.

It’s important to reward yourself with something you’re really excited about. And I’m pretty ridiculously obsessed with getting my own pair of Pajama Jeans.

My friend Heather thought it was hilarious when I told her. “It’s funny that you’re rewarding yourself for being healthier by buying fat pants.”

Well, yeah. I’m not saying I’m going to eat healthy forever, guys. This way I’m preparing for the future!

Stay tuned – if I can keep up the healthy eatin’ through February, I’m totally buyin’ myself a Slap Chop.