Hearts and Laserbeams

I ain’t gonna lie, our dogs are pretty cute.

I sat down to get a couple of things done before work this morning, and I turned the news on as background noise. And thanks to CNN, every news show now has that scrolly bar of headlines that goes across the bottom of the screen.

One of the headlines caught my eye this morning – it was something to the effect of a scientific study finding that alcohol consumption has been found to lessen pain caused by rheumetoid arthritis. And it just really made me laugh, because uhhh… the pain is probably still there, but if the test subject is wasted then the arthritis pain is the last thing on their minds. They’re more interested in where the hookers at.

So basically, if science has taught us one thing, it’s this: have some wine, you’ll be fine.

is it just me, or do short work weeks sometimes feel even longer than regular ones? the work day is over, the swollen prego cankles are propped up, and I’m about to catch up on this weeks episode of work of art while knitting while Josh sleeps off last nights work for a bit. life is good. have a great weekend folks!

just finished my swag bag items for July 10′s handmade brigade block party! you best be one of the first 50 people at the show to get your hands on a free swag bag!

for all the details about the show, check out http://www.handmadebrigadeofoc.com/ !

a couple of years ago, my friend gayle and I embarked on a mission to watch all six seasons of sex and the city. (we have very lofty goals!) every now and then, we’ll get together for another chunk of episodes, some drinks, and delicious food, and we’ve been very lax about getting through all of em. as summer gets going, bringing with it the knowledge that gayle’s moving to la in the fall to go to ucla, we have re-visited the quest and are trying to finish up season 6!

it’s been awesome because I haven’t really seen any of season 6 so while i had a general idea what the storylines were, these episodes are all new to me. and barishnakov is still pretty cute these days.

so last night we got together, gayle made tasty thai food for dinner, and we got our knit on as we watched four hours or so of SATC. we are so close to finishing, and plans are being formulated to watch the last two episodes over the 4th of July weekend!

what cracks my ass up about this show is all the superdrama that happens over lame shit, but actual dramatic events are completely glossed over. like there was an episode last night where candice bergen’s character is at a party complaining about being single and there’s shenanigans because she starts flirting with SJP’s boyfriend. drama drama drama! and then the chick from 3rd rock from the sun accidentally falls out of a window and DIES and it’s a super-minor thing that gets glossed over. I love this show, but stuff like that is a little weird.

since I wasn’t really keeping track of counting rows when I was knitting that baby sock at last week’s etsy craft party, I started over on it AGAIN, and by now I am an expert at that strange faux-cable texture they got goin on in the pattern! I just gotta knit a toe on this thing today and sock 1 is finished!!

this is too funny to not share with y’all – at dinner with gayle tonight, we were talkin baby shower. I tell her, “hey I’m cool with havin some kind of boozy drinks there if you think the ladies’ll be into it, I’m not that way where if I can’t drink no one else can either.”

it made it that much funnier that Gayle didn’t realize the perfect comedy that happened when she took a swig of her wine and said, “no it’s cool I don’t need booze to have a good time.”

I just woke up from the strangest dream… I don’t remember all of it, but the gist was I was hired by a guy that looked like John Edwards (the politician, not the psychic) to write his victory speech cuz he just got elected governor of mississipi.

I’ve never written a political speech before, guys, and that fact hadn’t changed in the dream. but for whatever reason, instead of the tons of qualified speech writers in this country, he wanted me to do it. and it wasn’t like we were friends or anything… it was just “hey can you write me this speech”.

so here’s the thing – I spent the entire dream racking my brain trying to get this thing written, i asked him tons of questions about his platform and what topics he wanted me to cover in his speech and i kept getting the brush-off, and all I ended up writing by the time i woke up was the opening line. he was gonna show up at this event riding in on an old skool riverboat, right? and my opening lines to his hey I won the governor position speech was something to the effect of:

“when I got the idea to run for governor here in the great state of Mississippi, I thought about the (something you like about Mississippi), the (something else you like about Mississippi), and the (one more thing you like about mississippi). but the biggest thing I asked myself was… (pause for effect, look back at riverboat)

does this gig come with a boat?”

zing!

we also write speeches for weddings and bar mitzvahs, folks! just don’t expect those speeches to be any good.

I promise you this isn’t my q-tip… I like to think it’s from someone who was trying to multi-task by cleaning their ears while on their morning walk, kinda like that dude who can shave while going 80 in the carpool lane or the gal stuck in traffic putting on mascara.

like maybe this q-tip walker was also on a cell phone, yelling “buy, buy, sell,sell!” to his assistant on the other end of the line.

this morning I’m celebrating sending all my licensing show stuff to the printers yesterday! since getting this stuff together meant days and days of getting up at 4 or 5am to work before going to work, my celebrating is taking the form of sitting in bed playing words with friends on my phone. (you can start up a game with me if ya like, my username is heartsandlaserbeams!)

I tried playing the word shit this morning in a game against my friend steph, because I had the letters and a place to put em… I never thought the game would actually allow a swear word, but I hit play and it accepted it which cracked me up!

but what cracks me up even more is a few days ago I tried to play the word wang in a game with my friend kim, and the game said “ummmmm… no.”

so moral of the story, the words with friends app likes some swears and dirty words, but not others. that it accepts any swears at all makes it better than the scrabble app in my book! I’m currently writing a letter to my congressman asking that all swears be included in all word games from here on out – boggle! crosswords! outburst! don’t discrimihate on truckdriver vocabulary! our swears just wanna be heard, dammit!

p.s., I like that using my swear on a triple word score pushed me into the lead on this particular game. and they say swearing gets you nowhere.